Efforts In Futility

WHAT I THINK. FEEL. AND SOMETIMES DO.

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An Open Letter To Playtex Baby

Hello Playtex Baby,

I am writing to complain about the caps on your Playtex Drop-ins system bottles. This complaint applies to all the Drop-ins bottle sizes because they all use the same caps.
Mainly, the caps are an absolute nightmare to get off. They literally require a death force grip and simultaneous twisting/squeezing action. In no way at all, in any universe, could this ever be a one handed operation (removing the cap), which is a huge minus.
So being that it is a two handed operation, under all circumstances, that means you must juggle your baby in the crook of your arm while holding the bottle and using your other hand to vice grip squeeze/twist the cap off.
If for some very common reason (diaper changes, baby rashes, soap, lotion) you have ANY kind of substance on your hands, even water, forget it. This operation is a no go. You must find some dry slightly rough surface (like a scratchy towel) on which to wipe your hands to get every molecule of emollient substance off your hands if you wish to have any semblance of success at this two handed operation.
This all being said, my child is now 8 months old. I have used the Playtex Drop-ins system since birth, using it to bottle feed breastmilk at first and now for formula. (Let’s not mention the one too many factory defects in your drop in liners that left me watching my precious liquid gold just leaking out onto the kitchen counters at which point I burst into tears, fell to my knees and cursed your company out loud). Yet through it all, it was not until now, tonight, that I reached my threshold for this ridiculousness of these stupid caps and decided to verbalize my complaint to you, Playtex, in the futile hope that someone, somewhere, out there in your corporate hierarchy will give a hoot about the reality of the everyday mom that uses your products, and march themselves down to R&D and announce, “Enough! Something must be done!!”
Tonight, Playtex, you cut me. No I do not speak of the metaphorical wounds you have incessantly inflicted upon me with every cursed 7 out of 10 times the dang bottle cap won’t come off (cause I can’t get the thing in an arm-bar and wrench it off), cause those are myriad- and deep. If I had to tell you every story of how your stupid too tight caps have extended my baby’s hunger, flown bottles across the room, made the soon-to-be-Botoxed furrow in my brow just a little permanently deeper, I’d be in James Joyce territory in the length of this tirade.
No, tonight the damn cap cut my freaking thumb when I tried to wrench it off and feed my crying child, causing me to bleed crimson droplets all over her pristine white snuggle bunny, the custom upholstered glider, and her $125 Woolino sleep sack. The cap came off and flew across the room. Immediately my daughter shlurped the nipple into her mouth and proceeded to nurse happily (it was bedtime) and all I could do is just sit there. Holding her. Watching blood ooze out of my thumb.
Because. Of. A. Baby. Bottle. Cap.

I have had it. I am writing to tell you this.
Of course I will continue to use your product because once you get the damn cap off they are fantastic.

I just want you to know you hurt me. And you made me bleed.

Sincerely,
Mrs. So-and-So

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Filed under mommylife

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NASA Goes to the Olympics – View all the cities that have hosted the modern Summer Olympics, starting with Athens in 1896 thru London in 2012. There have been 29 Summer Olympic Games held in 22 different cities. Repeating host cities include Athens, Paris, London and Los Angeles.

Credit: NASA/Goddard Space Flight Center

(via jtotheizzoe)

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Brazil’s President is a WOMAN. What is our DEAL!?! 
itseasyjusttolookaway:

Photo by Ricardo Stuckert
Amazing photo is amazing.
Here are 5 of the 7 Brazilian presidents from the New Republic Era.
(Right to Left) 
Fernando Henrique Cardoso (1995 -2002)
José Sarney (1985 -1990, first civillian to become president after 21 years)
Fernando Collor (1990-1992, resigned in a failed attempt to stop his trial of impeachment)
Luíz Inácio Lula da Silva (2003 -2010)
Dilma Rousseff (2011 - , first woman to become president)
The other two are Tancredo Neves - he was the one to win the 1985 elections but  on the eve of taking the oath he became severely ill. Sarney assumed office as acting president until Neves died on 21 April - and Itamar Franco (1992 - 1994), he died last year.

Brazil’s President is a WOMAN. What is our DEAL!?! 

itseasyjusttolookaway:

Photo by Ricardo Stuckert

Amazing photo is amazing.

Here are 5 of the 7 Brazilian presidents from the New Republic Era.

(Right to Left) 

Fernando Henrique Cardoso (1995 -2002)

José Sarney (1985 -1990, first civillian to become president after 21 years)

Fernando Collor (1990-1992, resigned in a failed attempt to stop his trial of impeachment)

Luíz Inácio Lula da Silva (2003 -2010)

Dilma Rousseff (2011 - , first woman to become president)

The other two are Tancredo Neves - he was the one to win the 1985 elections but  on the eve of taking the oath he became severely ill. Sarney assumed office as acting president until Neves died on 21 April - and Itamar Franco (1992 - 1994), he died last year.

(via fylatinamericanhistory)

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jtotheizzoe:

Even Monkeys Can Sense a Raw Deal

Are animals moral? It’s an ongoing debate, and one that is prone to anthropomorphizing animal behaviors. But scientists have been able to track down cases of moral judgment in certain species. Here’s a pretty hilarious example.

Capuchin monkeys love grapes. But they’ll also eat cucumbers if you give them one. They just really prefer grapes. This team had the monkeys complete a task, simply putting a stone in the handler’s palm, and then they got their food reward. Only they could see what the other monkey was getting. The first round goes fine, and one gets a grape while the other is given only cucumber. Next round? Well, that’s in the video :)

The researchers concluded that the monkeys were, in fact, weighing the deal they got, and responding with feelings of envy and frustration. Even more, when both get cucumbers, they are perfectly happy with that snack! It seems to be all about fairness and cooperation for them. It fits with the social nature of primates, as cooperating groups would be biologically rewarded.

While pretty funny, it definitely shows signs that some of our core emotions may have very basic neurological roots! 

Here’s a link to the full videotaped talk on monkeynomics and moral behavior in animals by Frans de Waal.

This is fantastic… Turns out we are all hard wired to be dissatisfied with inequality.

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I must post…

…before I get Carpal Tunnel Syndrome and all my blog design efforts are in vain. They don’t tell you how tough this crap really is- making a blog. Meaning, just the part of making it. Trying to make sure it looks right and somewhat sophisticated, so that when you’re trying to sound sophisticated and overeducated while pontificating on some (insert topic here) issue, people don’t look at your blog and say- ‘Whatever, she can’t even get her stupid sharing icons to line up straight and be the same size. Why should I care what she thinks?’ 

Heh heh. Yes, I believe I have found the point, the kernel of narcissism that exists in everything we outwardly do. The point is, people who make blogs (whether they care to admit it or not- and YES, even those Susie Homemaker-types who only post about cupcakes and the up cycled oven-mitt golf club covers that she just came up with ‘in her spare time’) do so because in some distorted and irrational dimension, we actually believe people give a shit about what we think.  And I must say ‘we’, because I now have a blog (this is actually about my 6th attempt, but first time using tumblr) and so I now fall into this category. Some human beings, a select few, actually are enlightened. The things they say have meaning and depth, to more than just two people. Their thoughts are examples of the profundity of conceptualization that humankind is capable of. People in this category do not have to be famous (yuck, I mean widely known… NOT famous. We will delve into my opinions on celebrity, fame, and how mainstream popular society is careening into a state of which the mental IQ would be equivalent to Jello, at some other point in time), but some well-known ones are spiritual leaders, journalists, authors/poets, people who know their shit about what they do, doctors, a spattering of politicians, and so on. These people, by the inherent nature of their wisdom, have automatic rights to have blogs. Like these people:

.Steve Jobs             Dalai Lama             Queen Noor

The rest of us must strive to earn that right. And in doing so, I wasted my entire weekend trying to get my icons to line up straight, putting in follow/share/twit/tweet/link/like/plus/pin/etc buttons so you can share my soon-to be eponymous wisdom-filled blog with the entire world.  I did it for you, my people.

All for you.

Filed under new to tumblr making my mark editorial posts self-deprecation tryingtosaysomethingprofound

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